Tag Archives: Autism

One Brush to Rule Them All: Get your exclusive UNbrush coupon code

In our house, we’ve got some Autism. It makes life awesome and beautiful.

One thing a lot of Autistic kids struggle with, though, is hair brushing. In this rite, I’ve tried to be a flexible parent so the hair brushing process doesn’t traumatize them. Sometimes when the sensory overload is too much, we’ll go out with messy hair.

But I have also tried just about everything under the sun to make the process less painful. We’ve used conditioning sprays. Left copious amounts of conditioner in the hair after bath time to help the knots slide out.

And of course, I’ve played around with different brushes.

The best hairbrush

After trial and error with everything I could buy locally, for years I invested in Wet hairbrushes. They worked better than everything else I could find, but I still had to hold the hair above the knot as I worked it out. We still spent a good 45 minutes in the process. I’d go slow because I didn’t want it to be a tear-filled experience for anyone. If I sped things up, they’d start flowing.

The most frustrating thing about Wet hairbrushes was that the handle would inevitably break off. The brush brush part would stay in tact, but without the handle my own hand would start cramping up about halfway through the hairbrushing process.

I’d put up with it for a few weeks, then find myself dropping even more cash on another Wet brush.

This year, everything changed. I found the one brush to rule them all, and the results have been truly miraculous.

UNbrush by FHI Heat

It all started with Instagram ads. While it usually takes a lot for me to buy something because I saw it on social media, it does occasionally happen.

These ads were reviews, seemingly from real people. It showed the first time they used the UNbrush. Much like me, the reviewers were skeptical parents who had already tried everything with limited results.

These videos were consistently filled with dropped jaws as the brush effortlessly slid through the hair — the child didn’t even notice. What would usually end in tears was a process that took mere minutes.

Eventually, I caved. Decided to give it a shot.

When my UNbrush arrived, I decided to try it out on myself before I got too excited. I’ve got tangly hair myself. If it worked for me, it would probably work for my child.

Guys, just like the other reviewers, my jaw hit the floor. I took it to my dry hair, which had not been brushed. (I had left it in its natural mixed wavy/curly state after the finger combing in the shower.)

This thing glided through it like butter. When I hit the back, there was a slight tug, but it wasn’t anything horrible — I just held above the knot and the brush instantly worked it out without pain.

Normally it takes me a good 15 minutes to work through my own hair. This took less than 60 seconds. And it made my hair look healthy. Without stripping away follicles at the root or turning the curls into frizz.

I was so psyched. The next step was trying it on my child.

Literally no reaction.

It was like magic.

The brush did its thing in less than a minute with zero additional detangling products. Suddenly our morning routine was no longer filled with chaos and anxiety. In fact, my kid’s even using the brush themselves rather than hiding from the process.

I will say the UNbrush somehow works better on dry hair than wet hair. But even with wet hair, it’s infinitely faster and less painful than any other brush I’ve ever tried.

As soon as I realized what I had found, I immediately ordered two more. I was getting ready for one to break, like I had experienced with the Wet brush, and I didn’t want to get caught unprepared.

But GUESS WHAT? This thing does not break! It doesn’t look like it would be the sturdiest brush you’ve ever tried, but by some feat of engineering that I don’t understand, it holds up to even the toughest knots like it’s nothing.

(I am still glad I ordered more, though, because as with all things kids, we’ve lost one. It’s probably with the socks that disappear in the laundry.)

Femme Frugality readers get 10% off their UNbrush order

The UNbrush is priced similarly to a Wet brush. And I’ve already told you how unhappy I was with that price point when the handle was breaking every time. The UNbrush was actually worth the price because I didn’t have to keep replacing it every month or two.

Even still, I wanted to find a way to save you all more money. So I reached out to FHI Heat to see if they could hook you up. And they agreed. Here’s your coupon code:

Use code FEMMEFRUGALITY to get 10% off at checkout!

Oh, and just so you know, you’ve got options. You can go sparkly:

You can get it in sky blue:

You can opt for Stillers colors:

You can even get a fancy spiral option:

The best part is, that FEMMEFRUGALITY code will get you 10% off your entire cart. So if you end up wanting to try FHI Heat’s other products, go for it. I’ve only ever tried the UNbrush, but given how wildly successful it’s been, I’ll likely be trying more of their products in the near future here.

Because it’s been worth every penny and then some.

It’s launch day!

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Today’s the day!

The very first episode of Mom Autism Money launched today! In it, we sit down with Paul Curley, CFA to discuss ABLE Accounts. We cover things like:

Using an ABLE account to shelter your savings from asset tests.
Tax benefits to opening an ABLE account.
The ABLE to Work Act.
529 rollovers.
Addition of debit cards, which make account access easier.
How to support the ABLE Age Adjustment Act at the federal level.
How to support the removal of Medicaid clawback provisions at the state level.

Here’s where you can currently listen to Episode One:

Make sure to subscribe to the podcast on your platform of choice!

In the coming weeks, we’ll be covering Special Needs Trusts, teaching boundaries to Autistic children and pattern recognition strategies for financial scams.

And that’s just the tip of the iceberg!

How To Make Your Own Sensory Toys For Autistic Kids And Early Learners

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This post is brought to you and contributed by an outside writer.

Whether you are a parent of an Autistic child or an early learner then you no doubt are in the market for some sensory toys. Previously, Femme Frugality showed you how to make a sensory bottle, which has helped a lot of parents calm their distracted child.

There are so many more types of sensory toys, though. You may want to make some yourself if you were inspired already to make the bottle. Of course, if you don’t have the ambition or time, then feel free to pick up some school supplies value bundles that include some sensory toys.

Here are just a few ideas of some sensory tools you can make yourself at home after you’ve checked out the sensory bottle.

Fidget toys

Just about anybody can enjoy the benefits of a fidget toy. The repetitive motor movements they require are a good way to help somebody focus and calm down when feeling anxiety.

For an Autistic child, the rhythm allows the brain to filter out any outside sensory information. Noises, lights and similar stimuli can cause an anxious child to have an episode.

When making a fidget toy, make sure that it has a few factors that make it useful during one of these episodes.

For instance, if it can respond to a movement the child has then it will help them to focus. A balloon filled with sensory sand that will squish in their hand in a rhythm works very well.

Another example is a string of beads, sort of like a rosary or prayer beads. These can also work well. When they feel fidgety, moving a bead across the string one after the other offers up a rhythm that allows them to block out stimuli from outside.

Weighted items

When a child’s system is overwhelmed with stimulation, a weighted item can be like a strong hug that allows them to calm themselves on their own.

A very popular tool is a weighted blanket that offers deep pressure stimulation. A good one provides even and gentle pressure that helps to create a sense of calm and safety. This is a tool to be used before a child starts getting overwhelmed and spiraling out of control with emotions and fear.

Since these blankets can be quite expensive, you can start out by trying one you make yourself to see if it works for your child. If you have an afghan or a thick quilt, you can fold it into fourths and then lay it over your child. See how they respond to it and then buy an actual weighted blanket.

Weighted stuffed animals also have a similar effect when placed on a child’s lap. Take a stuffed animal and open it up. Then fill the inside with things like sand, poly pellets or even some rice. When the child has it sit on their lap it will also feel like getting a big hug.

ASMR Soap Balls

Another way to calm the body is by stimulating the Autonomous Sensory Meridian Response (ASMR.) A popular way to do that right now is through ASMR soap balls.

To make soap balls, grate a soap bar or soap loaf. Glycerin soap tends to work best. After you’ve grated the soap, gather up a handful at a time. Spray it a few times with a water bottle, then mold it into a ball shape.

Allow the soap balls to dry for a few days. Then they’ll be ready for your child to squeeze in their hands. As the soap ball crumbles, it will make a crunching sound which initiates the ASMR.

ABLE to Work Shelters More Money From Asset Tests

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In honor of Autism Acceptance Month, Femme Frugality will be hosting a series of Wednesday articles that focus on the financial challenges and triumphs that Autistic poeple face and achieve. While this series is for Autism Acceptance Month, the following information applies to everyone with a disability diagnosed before age 26. Any dollar amounts referenced are for the 2020 tax year.

If you have a disability, the state often disallows you from doing things like building an emergency fund. They prevent you from doing so via asset tests.

Asset tests can prevent you from getting anything from SNAP benefits to Medicaid access.

Luckily, you can get around this asinine hindrance by keeping your money in an ABLE account — a 529 account which shelters your savings from asset tests. An ABLE account also allows your money to grow tax fee.

Qualified withdrawals from ABLE accounts are quite generous compared to a typical 529 account; you can pull money out for anything related to the disabled person’s life without penalty.

The amount you can save in an ABLE account annually is typically limited. But some employed adults can almost double these limits due to legislation called ABLE to Work.

How much can you normally save in an ABLE Account?

Typically, you can save $15,000/year in an ABLE account. Anyone can contribute towards this $15,000 max. It doesn’t matter if it’s you saving, or family and friends contributing towards your account.

How much extra can you save with ABLE to Work?

ABLE to Work is legislation that allows disabled adults with a job to stow away a little extra cash every year.

If you work a job and have an ABLE Account in your own name, you can save over the $15,000 limit with this legislation.

“The contribution limits for ABLE accounts and rules around ABLE accounts are determined by IRS codes,” explains Tricia Rosen of Access Financial Planning.

“The Tax Cuts and Jobs Act of 2017 made significant changes to ABLE accounts. It’s important to keep in mind the provisions of TCJA are only effective through December 31, 2025 at this time.”

So just how much extra can you save with the temporary TCJA changes under ABLE to Work?

That depends on how much you bring in.

Technically, you can save up to the federal poverty line. In 2021, that’s an additional $12,760 if you’re in the contiguous US. In Hawaii, the limit is $14,680. In Alaska, it’s $15,950.

If you don’t make that much per year through your job, you can’t put that much in. The max you’re allowed to put in is up to your total annual earnings — as long as those earnings are below the federal poverty line where you live.

What’s the catch?

Yes, there is a catch.

You can only save the extra ABLE to Work amount if you do not participate in an employee-sponsored retirement plan.

Technically, defined contribution plans disqualify you. You might have a defined contribution plan if:

The savings burden is put on you as an employee rather than guaranteed by your employer — even though the plan is offered by an employer.
The amount you will have to withdraw in retirement is dependent upon your individual savings within this retirement account — combined with market performance.

Some common examples of defined contribution plans that would disqualify you from saving more with ABLE to Work include:

401(k)
SEP IRA
403(b)
457(b)

Pension plans don’t count.

However, if you have a defined benefit plan through your employer — such as a pension — you qualify. You will be allowed to save the additional sum every year through ABLE to Work.

At least through 2025.

What if I have an ABLE Account across state lines?

What happens if you live in North Dakota but open an ABLE account from the state of Alaska?

Or live in Hawaii but open an ABLE account from the state of Iowa?

The additional amount you’re allowed to save is entirely dependent on your state of residence — not the state that administers your ABLE account.

That means the North Dakota resident is only allowed to save an additional $12,760. Even if they have an ABLE account from Alaska.

The Hawaii resident, however, would be allowed to save up to an additional $14,680. Even though their plan comes from Iowa in the contiguous United States.

What is the total amount you can save with ABLE to Work?

In 2021, the max allowable contributions including ABLE to Work are:

Contiguous US: $27,760
Hawaii: $29,680
Alaska: $30,950

Remember that if you earn less than the federal poverty line in any given year, your max allowable contribution amount will be less than the maxes available under ABLE to Work.

Additional Tax Benefits of ABLE to Work Act

The ABLE to Work Act — embedded in the TCJA — also allows you to count your first $2,000 of savings in an ABLE account towards the Savers Credit. This credit is typically reserved only for select retirement accounts. But until 2025, ABLE accounts make the cut.

As an individual tax filer, the max credit you could get would be $1,000 if you saved at least $2,000 in an eligible account. The amount doubles if you’re married and your spouse is doing the same thing.

This credit — which can be up to $1,000 — is non-refundable.

Non-refundable credits mean that if you owe the government $0, you can’t cash out the rest of your credit. It can reduce your tax, but it won’t get you cash in your pocket in and of itself.

529 rollovers are temporarily allowed. Well, kind of.

Many families can now also rollover funds from 529 accounts into an ABLE account, but they do have to meet certain requirements.

The real buzzkill on the 529 rollover change is that when you roll the funds over, they count as contributions for the year. So if you rolled over $15,000, you’d be able to contribute $0 more to your child’s ABLE account that year.

ABLE vs SSI Requirements

When your ABLE account exceeds $100,000 in total assets, it will start counting towards SSI asset tests. The max amount you can save in your account total varies by state.

It’s also important to note that SSI requirements are different from ABLE account requirements. SSI runs off of rules set by the SSA while ABLE is in the domain of the IRS. There may be instances where maxing out your ABLE account is detrimental to SSI or other state-administered benefits.

Always be careful to protect your benefits.

ABLE accounts are a great tool and a step in the right direction, but they do not solve all of the systemic financial obstacles the disability community faces.

Career Resources for Autistic Youth

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In honor of Autism Acceptance Month, Femme Frugality will be running a series of Wednesday articles in April that focuses on the financial challenges and triumphs Autistic people face and achieve.

girl with glasses reading a comic book, lying down in between the shelves of the library. Beneath this blue and black text reads "Career Resources for Autistic Youth femmefrugality.com"

If you have a child on the spectrum, you have one child on the spectrum. Your kiddo’s needs are completely different than the child next to them–even if the other child is on the spectrum, too.

With that in mind, today we’re going to be reviewing a governmental department which has resources to help those with disabilities–including autism–get the resources they need to start their careers off on the right foot. Your child does not have to have communication issues or visually-obvious accommodations in order to qualify for services.

If you are Autistic and American, you can benefit greatly from these services directly. Though I am writing to parents in this article, I do not mean to talk around you. But parents have a responsibility to figure these things out for their minor children, and I’m hoping that everyone has access to these services as young as possible.

However, the programs run by this department can help you throughout your life even beyond the days of youth.

State Vocational Rehabilitation Agencies

The federal government provides funding to state vocational rehabilitation agencies for a number of purposes. They aid both employers and job seekers to build inclusive workplaces, and go the extra mile to make sure training is available to those with medical needs.

Their aim is to help the disabled secure meaningful employment that highlights their skills, talents and interests. Their job is to remove barriers that may stand in their way of securing such employment, such as lack of guidance, lack of funding or lack of awareness and knowledge on the part of the employer.

Career Prep in Middle and High School

As a disabled student, your child has access to certain career-focused programs in middle and high school. The age at which your state starts attending IEP meetings to facilitate these opportunities through Individualized Plans for Employment (IPEs) may vary depending on which state you live in. Generally speaking, it’s a good idea to get in touch with your state vocational rehabilitation agency as your child transitions from elementary to middle school–or around age 12.

Even if they are not eligible for services just yet, staff can make you aware of the programs that exist in your state, and make you aware of the earliest age at which your child qualifies for specific services.

States have some autonomy, so programs may vary. But here are some examples of services that may be available to your child as they move through middle and high school:

Career exploration, in which you identify your skills and interests to apply to the following opportunities:
Facilitation of guest speakers relevant to your field(s) of interest.
Information about relevant career fairs.
Workplace tours and visits.
Summer employment opportunities.
Job shadowing.
One-on-one mentoring.
Information regarding relevant volunteer opportunities in the area.
Direct employment programs during the latter years of high school.
Education about your rights in post-secondary educational settings and the workplace, along with coaching for self-advocacy.
Information and access to job-specific education opportunities, including but not limited to vo tech schools and community colleges.

This is by no means an all-inclusive list. And not every opportunity will exist in every area of the country. But working with your state vocational rehabilitation agency will help you find as many of the doors that are open to your child as possible.

Funding for College, University or Trade School

No matter your child’s (or your own) age, there is a specific program across states that allows for funding of higher education.

Some states, like Pennsylvania, will only offer funding up to the average cost of community college, the reasoning being that the Office of Vocation Rehabilitation works in tandem with the state school system and community colleges to provide adequate services and accommodations to disabled students. You don’t necessarily have to go to a state school, but the amount vocational rehabilitation funding will be capped at that community college level.

Other states may pay full tuition even through grad school pending the availability of funds. Regardless of how much money you or your child is eligible for, you should take measures to get in touch with your state’s Vocational Rehabilitative Services agency. Any money for college is good money for college!

Note that for this program, you do not necessarily have to prove SSI disability qualification. As an individual on the spectrum, your child will qualify as disabled through SSI, but the SSI rigamarole is not something you’ll have to go through for this particular program.

After 21. Now what?

Vocational Rehabilitative Services which provide educational funding don’t have an age requirement. But so much else does when your child turns 21. Insurance requirements and coverages change, IEPs and the state school system are no longer required to execute the next step in your child’s growth, and if your child isn’t on the path to a traditional college education, it can be difficult to find support services which help them live a functional, meaningful life–even if they exist.

That’s where your state vocational rehabilitation agency can help. Well, sometimes. There are programs available which offer meaningful employment and social opportunities to those with communication and sensory needs dramatically divergent from the neurotypical population society has traditionally accommodated.

The hitch is your state has to choose to allocate their funding towards these programs.

Even if your state does not directly offer these types of specialized employment opportunities, your state vocational rehabilitative agency may be able to point you to other community organizations which do.

And if they can’t? They will have other programs established. The first step to learning more about them is contacting your state vocational rehabilitation agency. They’ll sit down and work with your child to create a plan to get closer to meaningful employment.

Additional Resources for Parents of Autistic Children

Getting resources and planning with your child for their future is definitely a long game. There are so many steps in the process. It’s legitimately a lucky miracle if you know some of these programs exist at all.

As you’re going through the process, here are some resources that can help make you and your child aware of their rights, services available to them, and the best available ways to pursue their dreams. Here are a few. If readers know of any more, they are highly encouraged to share them in the comments and I’ll add them to this list!

Letter issued by the US Dept of Education’s Office for Civil Rights: Students with Disabilities Preparing for Post-Secondary Education: Know Your Rights and Responsibilities
PACER’S National Parent Center on Transition and Employment: Middle & High School Transition Planning